Many men come to counselling because they feel angry all the time — snapping at people, losing patience, or bottling things up until they explode. Anger feels powerful and familiar. But often, what’s really going on underneath isn’t anger at all.

In counselling sessions with men, one theme I see again and again is the struggle to set boundaries. Many men find it difficult to say “no,” to protect their own time, or to ask for what they need. Instead, they keep saying “yes,” taking on more and more until they’re running on empty.

At Strong Minds Counselling, one theme comes up again and again in my work with men: the search for purpose. Many believe purpose has to come from big achievements — career success, financial security, or personal milestones. But real purpose often grows from something simpler, and more powerful: connection.

When we think about teenage years, we often picture exams, football matches, friendship groups, and the ups and downs of growing up. But for many teenage boys, there’s a hidden side to this stage of life: struggles with mental health that don’t always get spoken about.

Anger is the emotion that gets judged more than any other. When people think of anger, they picture aggression, shouting, or losing control. It’s seen as something destructive, something to be ashamed of. But here’s the truth—anger itself is not bad.

When I first started working as a personal trainer, I thought exercise was primarily about strength and fitness. However, over time, I noticed something more profound: training changed people’s moods. Stress eased, energy lifted, and they walked out of the gym lighter than when they came in.

You’re showing up.
You’re working hard.
You’re hitting the gym, paying the bills, doing what needs to be done.

From the outside, it looks like you’ve got it together. But under the surface, something feels…off. You can’t quite put your finger on it. You're not falling apart, but you're not exactly thriving either.

In my previous blog, “Why is My Teenage Son Struggling?”, I explored some of the reasons teenage boys can find life overwhelming. This follow-up looks at the signs to watch for and the practical steps you can take as a parent when you notice something isn’t quite right.

Parenting a teenage boy can be a challenging and rewarding experience. Adolescence is a time of big changes—physically, emotionally, and mentally.

Numbing gives you a quick hit of relief. For a moment, the stress quiets down, the anger fades, and the guilt doesn’t feel so sharp. That’s why it’s so tempting – it works right away.

s a parent, seeing your son angry can be painful and confusing. Maybe it shows up as slamming doors, shouting, or shutting down completely. Maybe you're noticing mood swings, school troubles, or he's getting into fights.

We often hear the phrase “put yourself first”, but for many men, that feels unrealistic. Life doesn’t stop — there are bills to pay, people to care for, deadlines to meet. Putting yourself first might feel selfish, indulgent, or even impossible.

A lot of men come to counselling because something’s off in their relationship. Maybe communication has broken down. Maybe there’s more arguing, less connection. Maybe things just feel flat.

Ever feel like you’re about to snap?

Like your chest is tight, your jaw’s clenched, and you don’t even know exactly why — but you just want to hit something, shout, or shut everyone out?

At 16, I didn’t feel confident — not really. I had a lot of anger I couldn’t explain, a lot of moods I didn’t understand, and a lot of pressure to act like everything was fine.

When most men think of weight training, the first images that come to mind are usually physical—bigger muscles, better shape, increased strength. And those are all valid goals.

Over the years, I’ve had the privilege of working with many men in counselling — men from all walks of life, and all with their own unique stories. One thing I hear often is, “I should’ve done this sooner.”

Let’s face it: life can get tough, and sometimes we all need a bit of help to handle it. Whether it’s stress from work, struggles in your relationship, or just feeling stuck in a rut, talking to someone can make a difference.

I’ve asked myself this question more times than I care to admit:
“Why can’t I seem to control my anger?”

For many men, ignoring the warning signs their bodies send has become all too common.